Another Firday passed me by and I couldn't find a job
Seemed I had nothin better to do than to go out and join the mob
Sammy the Shark said, "What's your name?"
I said, "It's William Malone."
He said, "That ain't no kind of gangster name, from now on you're 'Billy Bones'."
Billy the Boncrusher, that's my name.
My first job was smalltime, collect from the high school coach
Who'd bet against his own Bulldogs with a thousand dollar note
But much to the coach's dismay, his Bulldogs covered the spread
And when he said that could not pay, I started with his head
Baseball bat to the ribcage, brass knuckles to his jaw
And I just left him laying there with a jar of apple sauce…I'm a pretty good guy
I'm Billy the Bonecrusher, that's my name
I headed down to Maine Street to collect from Father James
Who said God was always on his side when he bet on Notre Dame
But the luck ran out and I had to collect the money from his offering tray
And when showed up five grand short, we both began to pray
Me, I prayed for forgiveness. Father Jones prayed for his life.
And I have to say, I felt sorry for him
so I only hit him twice…I'm a pretty good guy
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